Spill it out: Being Like vs “like”

Social Media has changed how we live our lives and sometimes it can have very negative affect. We always cared about being liked, but now with social media, words like “instagram-famous,”  it’s a whole different kind of desire to be liked and it’s very hard as a blogger and a every day girl. 

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Do you ever get this frustrating feeling like everything you do now has to be valued by others?  What determines how GREAT a blog post, pictures of graduations,  or a status on going to a movie? Does it not mean anything if a post does not get at least get 50 likes. Maybe it’s because we live in a digital age where our lives are exposed–but remember: only some have heard and only a few actually know.

We worry so much about being liked physically and by a button. We care about how many followers we have on instagram to snapchat, how many friends we have on Facebook. Is it worth putting ourselves out there to be liked and followed because with those ‘likes’ also comes no likes and feelings of rejection.

Digit age has affect our lives. It’s weird but this is how our lives our lived now–online.  Social media and likes, counting the number of friends online is unhealthy. We shouldn’t care about being liked, but instead care about being respected, cared for and appreciated for who YOU are.

That “like” isn’t real.

The like and sometimes what we see in the picture isn’t what’s real.

I am guilty to this as well in my blogging and personally. But, I’m not blogging for the likes, I’m doing it for myself.  I am doing it cause I want to bring imperfection to the world.  But, I still want to be liked, naturally. When I post a status I get worried that I am “too much,” that some how that “like” will give me satisfaction or validation. I’ve been told by a guy that I was annoying, that he had to put up with me, so I had to put up with his burping in my face. Thus, I began to worry more. It took a lot of effort to say “fuck it, I’m sharing these pictures because I want to for me not for anyone else.” I’m not going to post “everything” I’m going to share what I want and others can think what they want. But, when I started blogging, I began to feel the same need to be liked and began struggling with it. I stressed because over followers, likes I was getting, the status of my post, how well a post was doing, and the unfollowing. When really it shouldn’t determine my worth and my ability to be a good writer/blogger. Worrying about being liked is a so unhealthy and is why I want to write this post.

As a blogger I want readers/followers that like what I put out and connect with my blog post and captions and/or photographs on my instagram. I don’t want someone to follow me or like the picture to get my attention or to just follow them. A lot of time it can feel like people are playing a game with you just to get those likes and followers. You say you want originality but you keep the fake accounts? What if you don’t connect with what they shared, you don’t agree with it, or it’s just not you.What good does that do anyone?! And if someone I follow, follows me back, I do get happy because that means they took time to read and saw what I was doing. They may have thought “hey we are on the same wave length.”

Liking a blog post, comments or responding to bloggers or post is good. Feed back is always important and likes, comments, etc are ways of giving feedback. Positive or negative–take the negative unless its direct at you personal–as room to grow! For me as a blogger to do a give away it’s not in my nature to be like “asking” for followers. Not saying for bloggers who do it isn’t bad thing it’s just not me. But a lot of times I ask myself where is the real in blogging anymore?!?! 

Note: When I network or connect with other bloggers or followers, I never say follow me. I talk to them like they are my friend, like we are drunk girls in the bathroom. I also take notice in who is following me and if I think we could easily be friends in IRL I follow back and comment to get to know, connect, and become friends. I might not do it right a way, but it takes a few times especially online before you realize this girl/boy is totally my bestie, or squad material.

For my non-blog-related posts I find it more satisfying when I post something and my friends who like it know the story behind that post. Remember just because you get all those likes all those numbers  doesn’t actually give you validation or worth. And it can make you feel good but only for a second, because at the end of the day all you have is yourself and the people who know what actually happened.  What really matters is who’s answering us and who’s there. That is when you know who’s in your life is real. Having the people who support you and know what’s happening in your life, who see what you are doing digitally but know what you are actually doing.  We want someone who’s going to like it for they know what’s behind your online message. Other’s are just guessing.

Just Remember:

It is better to be liked for who you are then what others want you to be; and if they don’t like you for who you are or what you put out via instagram, snapchat story, or status. Your not getting the “likes” fuck it–your worth isn’t determined by that.