Including a Lookbook with my new favorite summer romper. I hope you like what I wrote I finally have the nerve to share more of my writing that I’ve saved over the years and only a few people I trust have read.
It would be so much easier if I didn’t like you. I wouldn’t feel the urge to talk to you. You wouldn’t be on my mind. It would be a lot easier not to have a care in the world. You would be some guy who I talk to for entertainment. Some guy who is there every once in a while. Some guy who I never wonder about, wouldn’t remember what you told me you do, or what you like, if you have siblings. But I remember everything you said, which makes it even harder.
Why couldn’t you be some guy that calls me up out of the blue? Why couldn’t you be like the rest of them? But if you were like the rest of them, I wouldn’t be into you like this.
I am into you as a person. I am into you as a friend. I have formed a connection, my eyes have locked onto you, and I am liking what I am seeing. And I hate every minute of this.
Most guys can’t even hold my attention, so when it happens, it’s like something comes over me. And I remember why I don’t want to be into you like this. I am agonizing waiting to see if you’ll text me first or even back. I wonder if you are wondering about me. I feel foolish that I am and you are not. I get mad at myself for even letting myself like you like this, getting excited when you text me, but I can’t help what I feel when I text you with a smile on my face. When we are together, and you look me up and down in my tight Grease like jeans like your into me as much as I am into you. How it’s so easy to be myself, I don’t question myself around you. It would be so much easier if I didn’t like you.
Because here I am letting myself be into you as you are into me, but there is something that is stopping us. Like the elephant in the room. Like why couldn’t you be some guy? Why did we have to end up like this, why did we have to care? Why did you have to be so easy on the eyes, and so easy to talk to. It couldn’t be simple, and it never is when you like the person.
This is why I don’t want to like you. Because it would be so easy if I don’t like you.